Tuesday, November 30, 2010
1. I'm a very loyal friend, if someone is messing with someone I care about (in high school or at the age of 34) I will take them out and not think twice about it.
2. Some people say I'm the funniest person they know (They've got a great sense of humor).
3. Some people totally don't get my jokes/comments (what's their problem?)
4. I thank "enter your deity here" everyday Girls Gone Wild wasn't around when I was younger and "going wild" . . . my breasts were amazing and I didn't mind showing them off every now and then, ahhhhh memories.
5. Being a surrogate mother was one of the most emotionally rewarding things I've ever done . . . and I think I may do it for just one more couple (It was that awesome)!
6. I worry that my daughter will grow up to be bitchy, so I've tried to talk to her since she started school about how to be a great friend and never say anything about someone that you wouldn't say to their face.
7. I'm used to being good at things, so when I'm not, I get frustrated and want to quit (I hate that about me).
8. I do too much and it's hard for me to say no when I know people need my help.
9. Every now and then, I look around at my house and family and wonder how I can have all of this? I still feel like I'm not an adult sometimes, like I was just in high school 3 years ago.
10. I want to punch people in the throat when they say something is "gay" . . . get a new fucking adjective, one that fits.
11. Did I mention I have the mouth of a sailor?
12. I have a dolphin tattoo and a butterfly tattoo- and apparently tons of women do- but I chose mine because I used to swim competitively and butterfly was my best stroke.
13. I had sex too early but wouldn't take back anything that I did in the past because it made me who I am today . . . . it helped me realize I wanted to teach other people that sex doesn't equal love and it's not something to be ashamed of or taken lightly.
14. I'm addicted to my computer, seriously, I am.
15. When I watch BIG LOVE I think about what it would be like to have other wives with me, and I think I could make it work.
16. I hate it when people use religion as fact in a discussion. I don't believe in God, so your argument holds no validity with me . . . but feel free to have your own beliefs- just don't assume everyone has your faith.
17. Speaking of which, If your god was so against homosexuality wouldn't it have been in his "Top Ten" . . so maybe people should use their "church money" to keep people who steal, murder, commit adultery and work on Sundays from getting married.
18. I am for equal rights- and no one can make me believe ANYONE should have any less rights than I do.
19. I'm glad we don't have any pets.
20. The three movies where I cried the hardiest (heaving chest, can't breathe, barely consolable) were Schindler's List, The Green Mile and Brokeback Mountain.
21. I'd like to teach full time at my college but SOMEONE won't fucking retire.
22. Songs on the radio "take me back" and sometimes to places and people I shouldn't think about.
23. When I read the description of a Scorpio, it is true (for me).
24. There is nothing wrong Masturbation at any age.
25. I don't want to lose my children, but I can't wait to see what kind of people they grow up to be.
I see your 25 and raise you 1 more . . .
26. I have a wild imagination. Sometimes I'll think about if a robber comes in, or if this happens- what will I do and I'll work out an ENTIRE plan in my mind about how I'm going to get my family out safely . . . .. did I mention we're sitting in Baskin Robbins?
Monday, November 29, 2010
First of all, I'm coming off a high of spending a day celebrating my surro-girlies 2nd birthday (will post about that ASAP with pictures).
Next, not only did I get an adorable Thanksgiving Day picture from the guys but I'm in the process of making plans to visit "The Wonder Twins" (Gideon & Harper) in January when I have to go to Los Angeles for the California Gift Show to shop for my store, Ruby Q's.
FYI- The Wonder Twins is what I called Harper and Gideon during the pregnancy. I grew up watching the cartoon and since they were boy/girl twins, I couldn't call them "my girlies" or "the boys" . . . so the Wonder Twins it was.
"Wonder Twin Powers Activate, Form of a Fetus . . . Form of Another Fetus!"
Oh- and I actually ordered Holiday Cards, picked a photo from this weekend instead of stressing about a formal picture . . . finding matching clothes, hoping for no black eyes or facial scratches, don't care who's actually looking at the camera . . . much less stressful!
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
How dare you hurt a couple this way. You are lucky that I am not in the same state as you or I would seek you out and KICK YOU IN THE UTERUS!
In all seriousness, this is why I think it is very important to use a reputable agency as Intended Parents and as a Surrogate. My agency, Growing Generations, screens Surrogates and their partners medically and mentally. They do background checks on both the woman and her partner/husband.
Lastly, Audrey, I'm serious, you better hide that uterus if you see me . . . because my beautiful uterus (proven fact FYI) is stepping up to your cheating/scamming uterus and I think all my readers know who'd win that Contest. It's a Uterus-Off Y'all!
FYI- for those of you who don't know me, this is a joke. Now, I would think that would be a "no-brainer" but I guess not, as I received a comment about how horrible and sick I am. LOL! Whatever! I would never kick someone in the uterus . . . although, if I did- it would probably hurt her less than the hurting of the couple she scammed.
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Let me give you a little history . . . even though I have only purchased and used APPLE (MAC) computers since 1985, I do not own an iPhone yet. Once they make a deal with Verizon, I'm sure I'll be in line, but for now I refuse to pay money for a phone and then have to pay more money to use it with my provider. In September of this year, I received an iPad as a gift. Something to help me "make it through" the boredom that is Doctor Ordered Bed Rest. I like the iPad. It is fun and has lots of games for myself and my children too. Ruby loves the math flash cards, Preston enjoys Angry Birds and Sawyer loves Checkers. All these games were Free, as was Smurf's Village.
So . . . . . I found out last night while looking at my online bank statement that almost $70 was charged to my account from iTunes. Upon investigation, I discovered my 4 year old (who has played various games for months with no issues) had purchased smurfberries while playing the "FREE" game. Specifically, he purchased 1 bushel for $11.99 and 11 buckets at $4.99 each. Luckily he didn't click the most expensive option, Wheelbarrow for $59.99, because if he did, with the amount of times he clicked it, my total would've been over $700!!
Since this has happened, I have now learned that you can change the settings on your iPad or iPhone to deny In Ap Purchases. I did so immediately! Another thing that someone shared with me is that the iOS will keep you logged on for 15 minutes after you download the app. Additional purchases won’t require a re-entry of the password during this 15 minute interval . . . so you may want to not let your kids use your device until 30 minutes past an authorized purchase. I have also emailed iTunes to try to get my money back. I consider it an unauthorized purchase. Every time I've ever made a purchase, I have to put in my password. I have never made an IN AP Purchase, didn't even know it existed, so I assumed my kids didn't have access. I WAS WRONG.
Last night, I started googling about this very thing and have found I am far from alone! I have found others on Twitter complaining about their kids purchasing Smurf Berries too! I even stumbled upon a father who complained to the media because his son did the same thing. Since, there are other parents out there in the same boat, I've decided to start a Facebook Group, "I got SMURFED by Capcom!" It's a group for Parents who found out (the hard way) they need to change setting to "NO IN AP PURCHASES" on their iPads and iPhones because they were shocked to learn their children were making unauthorized purchases on their Apple products.
I am really hoping that Apple had no clue, because it seems very obvious to me that this is a BIG SMURFIN' SCAM! If it was an oversite, I hope they fix it quickly. When I read how Smurf's Village has outsold Angry Birds, I believe it . . . perhaps Capcom, the company that created the game, knows EXACTLY what they are doing!
BEWARE! Don't get Smurfed like me!
Heard back from Apple and I will be refunded . . . "Please note that this is a one-time exception, as the App Store Terms and Conditions state that all sales are final." I hope APPLE speaks with Capcom about this or their iTunes Customer Service is going to be working a lot of overtime on this issue.
Story got picked up by the Associated Press . . . since there have been tons of newspapers/websites/blogs picking it up . . . Here's a link to one of the stories- Bushels of "Smurfberries" cost parents buckets of cash
I also did a quick interview with KGO Radio in San Francisco and a quick blurb on the local news station (below)
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Originally Posted on 4/22/09 My Uterus is Just Very Friendly! . . . proceeding with second journey.
Originally Posted on 11/6/2008 Shaved Legs and Memory Lane #1 - Ruby's birth/first birth experience aka Poop fest.
Originally Posted on 8/26/10 These are a few of my favorite things . . .
Originally Posted on 6/30/09 It's the Least I could've done . . . - recalling the Thank You BBQ George and Sanj threw my family where I got to meet their friends.
Originally Posted on 7/16/09 How to remember . . . - where I decide how to commenarate my Surrogacy journeys.
Originally Posted on 12/28/09 Where is all the Good PR on Surrogacy? - because it can be read enough.
Originally Posted on 5/8/10 It's Hard to Name Babies - and guess what? They went with one of my unused names! YAY!
Monday, November 15, 2010
If you remember, back in June 2010 I went to San Francisco Pride with two of my surrogate friends. One of the most eventful activities we participated in was the NOH8 Photo Shoot.
When we got to the front of the line, we introduced ourselves and explained why I was exposing my belly and putting the stickers on it. I am not sure if we were the first Surrogates to pose for photographs but just in case, I sent them pictures of us waiting in line and one from the Pride Parade. Later, I saw they posted it on their blog (towards the bottom). At the time, I told them I'd compose a "WHY I POSED" but never got around to writing it down. Well, I finally ordered copies of my picture and it arrived today . . . so I figured, I should take the time to complete it.
One day, it would be awesome to take another NOH8 photo with the my both my surro-families; 4 Dads, 2 sets of twins and the Surrogate that loves them all, me.
In the last 9 years I have given birth to seven children. Three are my own and four (two sets of twins) are babies I birthed for two different Gay couples. My Uterus is an Ally.
I consider my Surrogacy for Gay Men my own Uterine Activism. I feel strongly and passionately about Equality and figure, if I don't have tons of money to donate to the cause, I at least have a Uterus and Blog that can send a powerful message. I belong to HRC, make donations to organizations fighting for LGBT Rights, including Marriage Equality and posing for the NOH8 Campaign was one more thing I could do to let society and my own kids know that I SUPPORT GAY FAMILIES.
Please know that I will continue to "fight the fight" because no one has the right to tell my friends, the fathers' of my surro-babies or (many years from now) my own children that they can't marry whoever they LOVE. I pledge to repeal Prop 8 and restore marriage equality in California . . . and I promise I will fight for your rights until the day I die.
*Natasha & Anjali 11/28/08
*Gideon & Harper 10/12/10
-Kelly & her Uterus
***** UPDATE *****
They have put it on their site . . . here's the direct link to mine CLICK HERE and if you want to read other people's stories CLICK HERE! I also have it below, so years from now I'll still have it, when the link isn't working anymore.
Repost from January of 2009
All my surgical tape has fallen off (okay, some of it pulled) to reveal a C-section scar about 5.5 inches long. This is one of the things my OB, Dr. Knight will be checking this Tuesday at my 6-week follow up appointment. This got me thinking about scars in general.
The definition of the word Scar:
1. A mark left on the skin after a surface injury or wound has healed.
2. A lingering sign of damage or injury, either mental or physical.
I agree with the first meaning but I'm not quite "on board" for the second (regarding my own experience). When I look at my scar the last thing that comes to my mind is "damage or injury".
I look at My Scar and see a lingering signs of Hope, Joy and Family.
I'm not going to say I don't have any vanity, because I do, but I am a bit bummed that my days of wearing bikinis are over. This has nothing to do with the scar from my surrogacy pregnancy, it has to do with my belly from my own three pregnancies. The last time I wore a bikini was probably the year 2000. The scar is so low that even with a bikini on (when Hell freezes over) no one would see my scar. It's kind of a bummer because it could be a great conversation starter.
The subject of scars even takes me back to the night before our embryo transfer. I was watching The Replacements on TV while trying to "talk myself down" to administer the shots. There's a great line from the movie that comes to mind. The Quarterback is in a huddle trying to say something inspirational to his teammates before a win or lose play of the game. What he comes up with is . . ."Pain heals, Chicks dig scars... Glory lasts forever".
Well, the pain is gone . . . I'll have to get back to you on the other two! ;)
Saturday, November 13, 2010
As of now the "Wonder Twins Complete Journey" starts at our positive home pregnancy test and ends with me in my hospital gown, going in for my C-section. Enjoy!*
*For those of you that are other surrogates carrying twins, don't let my belly scare you . . . I can get big! :)
Friday, November 12, 2010
I can't believe it's already been one month since Gideon and Harper were born. I have a feeling my last 4 weeks have been completely different from N and D's . . . just as it was different than George and Sanj's first month.
I have been losing weight and they have been losing sleep. I have been trying to get my life "back to normal" and their "normal" has changed forever.
For me, it's been a hard getting things "back to normal" this time around. Being on bed rest for several weeks was great because the babies stayed in for almost 38 weeks and helped my swelling come down but boy did it SUCK! It's almost impossible to take care of 3 kids and a business while on bed rest. Thankfully, my mom came up again (like last time) for a few weeks to help out. I was able to drive to doctors appointments, so Tuesdays and Fridays were a dream. I would actually do my hair and make-up because I had someplace to go . . . well, usually I would. I guess the one day STAR Magazine decided to take a picture of me (for an article that came out in an early November issue) I had neither my hair nor my make-up done. Luckily, the article was very nice but the picture, well, I guess it could've been worse . . . I could've been bending over or picking my nose. I even had several customers tell me they couldn't believe that was a picture of me, because "I'm so pretty in person" . . . LOL . . . yeah, usually I'm photogenic too, but what are you gonna do?! But I digress . . .
Once I got home from the hospital, I wanted things to go back to normal (after weeks of doing nothing) but recovering from surgery doesn't quite make that an option. So for the last few weeks, I've been taking it easy, trying not to re-open my "baby wound" and longing for the day I can lift heavy things at work and re-join the Gym. I have a 2-4 more weeks until that can happen, but I know it's coming and that makes me happy.
I also rejoined Facebook, for sanity's sake. I thought it best to dump my Facebook back in August, after the news of my IPs expecting leaked. It was hard enough not telling anyone about who my Intended Parents were, but with all the coincidences piling up (surrogacy, twins, October due date, Disneyland trip) . . . it became impossible. Friends would ask, "Are you their Surrogate" or "I think I know who your IP's are . . . am I right?" I would just email/text/say back, "How cool would that be?" It has been great to get back on and interact with everyone. I really missed seeing what all my friends were up to.
Lastly, I am going to do a post about "The Blues" that a lot of Surrogates, including myself, go through after the birth . . . so there will be a bit more of "getting back to normal" in that post too. But for now, I have to sign off . . . have normal mom stuff to do- laundry, Doctor's appointments and Dinner to think about. I guess my NORMAL, for the most part, has returned.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Well, this morning I checked my email and the usual stuff was there . . . spam from Old Navy, emails from my former IPs, Facebook notifications and business stuff. Nestled in there was an email from Forbes entitled 2005. It was an email I wrote to myself from 2005. I love stuff like this. It's the same reason I'm one of those lame mom's who writes the full page letter that accompanies the Holiday Card. I love to look back and remind myself where I was, where I thought I was going, etc.
Thought I'd share it with you (in bold) and my comments about it (not bolded).
Greetings from your past. In the fall of 2005, you agreed to receive this message, which has been preserved in the Forbes.com E-Mail Time Capsule. For more details, visit the links below.
Here is the text of your message:
You are living in a one bedroom apt while you wait for your house in Gridley to be finished (next week). We look back on this time as the "dark weeks" . . . we had to move out of our first house 6 weeks before our current house was finished. We chose to rent a furnished apartment and thought, "how bad could it be?" Glass 1/2 empty- we went from 2500 sf to a little over 800 for 6 weeks . . . 1 bed, 1 bathroom, fold out couch and no cable. I missed the entire last season of Alias! Glass 1/2 full- went from 800sf to 3440sf . . . it was like moving from our living room to a palace! LOL CLICK HERE FOR PICTURE
Ruby is 4 and Preston is 2 1/2 and you just turned 31. CLICK HERE FOR PICTURE Oh, sweet memories . . . when Ruby didn't have an attitude and Preston was loving wearing his new "big boy underpants" . . . and I was so young, 31 sounds way better than 36!
Ricky and you just celebrated your 5 year wedding anniversary. The second 5 years went just as quickly as the first five!
Kids- debating about having another . . . . want one but sometimes think about how much easier it would be with 2. Obviously, we decided to go ahead and go for the #3 baby. Actually, this is around the time I applied to be a Surrogate. Then when Growing Generations called me about it, Ricky and I decided to finish our own family before we proceeded with the Surrogacy. So we put my online application on hold and got busy . . . less than a year later Sawyer was born. *Actually, according to this, I've birthed 5 babies in 5 years! Now of course, that includes 2 sets of twins, so it's more like 3 births in 5 years . . . .but it sounds much cooler the first way!
Jobs- working PT at American River College but just applied for FT at Chico State in the EOP program Still working Part Time at ARC but never even got an interview for the Chico State job . . . their loss! I can't feel too bad, I've actually gotten every job I've ever interviewed for . . . well, except for APPLE, which went on a hiring freeze (10 years ago) after my second phone interview for a Curriculum Developer postition. Man, I still think how different my life would have been if that freeze never happened and I had 10 years worth of Apple Stock. But things happen for a reason . . . maybe I wouldn't have had the time to be a Surrogate? Things worked out exactly as they should've, I know that much!
5'4" and about 1XX-1XXlbs depending Yes- I blocked it out . . . no one knows my weight!!! I'm still the same height and about 3-5 pounds heavier . . . not too bad for birthing 5 kids in 5 years! LOL
I'm glad I did this. Just wish I did the 10 year option too . . . maybe I did! Maybe in 2015 I'll get another one. I totally forgot I had done this but now that I think about it, I think I did do another one with encouraging words. Guess I'll have to wait and see!
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Here's the thing . . . at 36 is when the insurance Growing Generations uses for Surrogacy goes up. Now, they aren't calling you old, they're just saying your uterus has seen better days, years, in fact. You can still be a Surrogate, it's just that your IPs will have to pay a little bit more to insure your old, worn uterus.
I'm not saying that I would for sure be a Surrogate for the third time but it's nice to know it's an option and I guess it is, as long as I don't waste time deciding. In my mind, if either set of my IPs asked for me to carry for them again, I would say YES. I have developed a wonderful relationship with both couples and think it would be cool to help provide another child for them. However, I know George and Sanj's family was complete with Natasha and Anjali and my other IPs have 3 week old twins . . . so I'm going to guess they aren't thinking of extending their family just yet. (Even though, as crazy as it seems, it would be something you'd need to start thinking about because the Surrogacy process is far from lightening fast).
Most of my friends and family have already asked me (even before I delivered) if this was the last time. I'd just tell them, I don't know, but it probably is. I think I'm in denial that my Surrogacy days are probably over, if I don't say I'm 100% not ever going to do this again, I don't have to think how sad that would be. Kind of like after giving birth to Sawyer, my youngest, I knew he was it for us but I didn't want to say it aloud, or that would make it true.
So for now, I'm not going to say never . . . but that it's pretty unlikely. I have dreams of a tummy tuck and it would be great not to be pregnant at my 20th High School reunion. Not to mention my uterus may go from "beautiful" to "she looks good for her age" . . . which I suppose is a lot better than "I've fallen and I can't get up!"
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
It was great to watch him be so at ease with himself after denying who he was for so long. I swear I teared up several times during the hour long program.
Now onto the Surrogacy part. He stated that he used a Surrogate and it was similar to a Private Adoption and implied that the surrogate didn't know who he was, that she just wanted to carry the babies and get on with her life and that a lot of Surrogates preferred it like this.
Hmmmmmm . . . I guess that type of Surrogate exists but I have yet to meet (online or in person) a Surrogate who didn't want to form some sort of friendship with the Intended Parents. This sounds a lot like the "Womb for Rent" views that drive me nuts. I can't imagine carrying babies for someone and never meet them, not share the months that their babies are growing, and not seeing their faces the very moment their children are born. I understand he's famous but it can be done.
Sure, certain parts may leak, but it is doable . . . it is possible to meet and form a friendship over the journey. Have them there for the embryo transfer, various ultrasounds and appointments, spend time with the surrogate and her family, etc. Surrogacy can already seem surreal for IPs . . . meet your surrogate, possibly see them a few times (if you don't live too far away) and then, BAM- you have babies. This must have been super Surreal for Ricky . . . interview your Surrogate on the phone and then get your twins months later. Who knows, maybe they talked on the phone or emailed or had a secret blog . . . something to share the information about the pregnancy. Or maybe I'm letting my personal feelings about Surrogate/IP relations get in the way and this woman really was perfectly fine carrying babies for a man she met over the phone . . . who just happened to be Ricky Martin. Stranger things have happened.
Monday, November 1, 2010
Here's Natasha, Anjali, George and Sanj . . . very adorable Siberian Tigers & Dads!
Here's one of Anjali with her Appah
and here's Natasha, stalking :)
And here's one of my own children
Hope everyone had a great Halloween, whether it was their first, second or 10th! :)