Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thankful for Mothers!

My mother and I had this great plan- She would come up to help me with my family and house for the time leading up to the girls' delivery. We had it planned out perfectly based on my last three deliveries, she'd come up November 7th (35 weeks) and she'd stay until the 21st. That way she'd be able to help me out at the very end, be here for the delivery and maybe a few days of recovery. Of course, as you know it's now November 27th, the girls haven't arrived yet and my mom is still here. HA! So much for my perfect plan, eh?

Luckily, My mom is a realtor, so with the market totally sucking right now she has been able to come up for a few weeks . . . actually, it will almost be a month by the time she leaves December 2nd. I am so grateful she was able to come up. I even told her in October, when we were planning everything, that if she left before I delivered that her being here would still be a tremendous help. I haven't been able to bend over really for weeks and it's amazing how quickly my house gets cluttered with 3 kids, most specifically my 2 year old. Not to mention my house is over 3400sf, which means a lot of house to keep in order when you're lugging around twins and can move a little quicker than a snail. Honestly, I think by having my mom here to help me get the kids ready for school, helping me taxi them everywhere, helping me with the house, meals, etc. it's probably the reason I haven't delivered yet. With my own kids I work up to the day I deliver and don't have any extra help until relatives visit after the birth. With my surro pregnancy I was pulled off of work at 30 weeks and for the last 3 weeks, when I'd usually deliver, I've had help 24 hours a day. So really, I guess I should tell my mom it's her fault :)

It has been great having her here for so long. Besides all the invaluable assistance, it's been nice for her to be able to spend so much time with her grand kids. Ruby's school even had a "Grandparents Day" that Granny Red (my mom, who's a redhead) was actually able to attend because she was already here with us! My kids are LOVING the fact she's been here so long, but I think we've all been spoiled. They're used to grandparents just visiting for a weekend, now whenever any of them come up they'll wonder why they have to leave so soon.

Another great thing was that my mom was able to meet the Intended Parents and will be around to see the girls she helped "keep in" for so long. Also, my mother in law will be coming up on the induction date (November 30th) and will stay with us until December 7th. That way, she can meet the parents and the babies and will help us out with the kids while I'm in the hospital and for the first few days I make it home with stitches and staples. At first Rick and I felt really bad about our mom's taking off work to come help out when the twins aren't their grandchildren. But they both had communicated to us that they wanted to help us because they were nervous about the twin pregnancy/birth and ultimately, we are their children and their grandchildren would need them. Not to mention my mother in law gave birth to triplets over 30 years ago and she knows the journey of multiples.

Honestly, the whole surrogacy process has gone flawlessly except for waiting for the delivery. We met great parents right away. Our transfer succeeded the first time. The parents ended up with twins. We've had 37 weeks of great reports on the girls and my health. Everything has been wonderful. The only "bummer" part in the whole process was my inability to plan my mothers visit better. But really, I swear, if she didn't come up when she did, I would've had the girls earlier, I'm sure of it. So I guess I should try not to feel bad. I know she has enjoyed herself but she also has left a husband, job and animals for almost a month and when she returns home will no doubt have tons to do. Perhaps I should start thinking of a nice Thank You gift to send her upon her return.


Mme Marron said...

Hi Kelly--My husband and I are old friends of S and G and also parents of 13 year old identical girl twins, whom S and G have watched grow up. Today I'm thankful for you and your incredible act of grace and generosity. S and G have wanted to be parents for just ever and I am so grateful to you for helping to make that happen. So--although it's a day late--happy thanksgiving. And good luck this weekend. xo Stephanie

Drea Timmons said...

Wow, that's great that your mom was able to come and help. Also that they were able to meet S & G. I didn't think that that was allowed. I thought that only the surro's got to meet them. I guess things have changed since I did my research. Glad you are doing well.