On my Private Surrogate Group on Facebook we share pictures of bellies, Intended Parents and surro babies. I love seeing all their photos and of course love to share my own. I especially have a place in my heart for big ol' belly pictures. I think it's because I love being pregnant and I love having a big belly full of babies! Hell- some of the times I've felt the sexiest was when I was pregnant. I really do miss it. A lot of women say they want to get back to their pre-baby body, sure, I do too . . . but you know what I'd like even more than that? A Pregnant Belly! When I see the pictures and read the posts about those that are currently preggo, I get a little jealous.
I think I've said this before but one of the reasons I enjoy being a Surrogate is that I get to be pregnant, have the big belly for a few months and NOT have to raise another child. I totally enjoy being pregnant. I have cherished the 5 times I had "the belly" and even though now I have a flabby, stretchy, C-section apron tummy, I wouldn't change anything. Which brings me to the next Surrogate sharing phenomenon- "getting stitched back together." I have a few friends, some of which were Surrogates, who have visited "Dr. Lookin' Good". I have seen the before and after pictures of the abdominalplasties, Boob Lifts, Boob jobs and I'll admit it- I'm jealous.
So- I'm at a kind of cross-roads. With insurance issues (supposedly) behind me, do I go for one last journey? One final affair with the belly? Make sure I do all the things I forgot to do the last two surro-journeys? Henna on the Belly? Belly Cast? Monthly Belly Art with the kids? OR do I retire from being a Surrogate and make the much needed Tummy Tuck/Boob Lift appointment with the plastic surgeon? OR do I have the best of both world's? Do one last hurrah and then go under the knife . . . right in time for my 20th high school reunion and a few years shy of my 40th birthday? My thirties were for babies and my forties and beyond will be for me. Like Angel said, "Today for you. Tomorrow for me!"
So which is it?
Start the process of dieting, exercising and the much needed Tummy Tuck to regain (or the closest I can come) my College Spring Break body?
Or bring a loving couple a child and a big belly for me?
Decisions, Decisions. I guess I need to really think about it all . . . but you know what they say . . . the third time is a charm.