Monday, January 4, 2010
I have been following a few Surrogates closely through their current journey and sadly, they don't seem to be having much baby luck. I think (at least I know I have thought this for myself) that things went really easy last time. I matched right away with a great couple, they picked a donor and we synced quickly, my body responded to the hormones great, and the transfer took the first time . . . with twins . . . identical twins . . . and girls, just like they hoped. Can it get any better than that? At least it couldn't get any worse, right?
Well, a few Surro-friends I have (friends that are Surrogate moms not substitute friends) seem to be destined to all be pregnant together, even though some signed up months ago and a few are just finishing their paperwork now. Without naming names, they are all dealing with different issues: IPs taking weeks or months to find a donor, a donor dropping out at the last minute, bodies not responding to the meds, unsuccessful transfer(s), or a blighted ovum just to name a few. That's a lot of stuff to go on- whether it's your first journey or your second. It makes you wonder which is more stressful? A first time where you have nothing to compare the negative too (wondering if it's you, etc)? Versus a second time where you have everything to compare it to . . knowing, it's not you (or is it?)- knowing that you had it so easy last time and totally took it for granted.
So, as a Surrogate, you may be wondering, is there anything you can do to help your IPs have positive results? Aside from the usual eating healthy, cutting caffeine down, keeping a positive attitude, taking your meds correctly, etc.
I've heard stories of athletes not showering, not shaving, or continually wearing dirty socks because their team was on a winning streak. It makes me wonder if Surrogates do the same thing for the second, third or whatever number transfer they undergo? I would think it would be pretty unsanitary (not to mention inhumane) for a Surrogate to bring a rabbit's foot in with her for the transfer and wearing a horseshoe around your uterus could be cumbersome. I also think not showering or wearing dirty clothes would scare off IP's pretty quickly. So, when Surrogates go in for the transfer, take their first pregnancy test and go to their first ultrasound after a positive pregnancy test, should they bring some sort of Baby JuJu with them?
I know what mine is. At my first transfer I really freaked out about giving myself the shots the night before the transfer. So much so that the night of the transfer, before George and Sanj left to go to bed (after a day of hanging out with me during bed rest) I made Sanj give me my shots on my right hip. Now, he had years of experience of giving mice shots, just not humans :) So when he pulled out the needle, blood squirted out. We put a band-aid on it but I still bleed through, staining my Pajama pants and underwear. So . . . . . my Baby Juju, at least for the moment, is my green polka dot panties and my pink/brown PJ pants (with horses). I pick these because every time I wear them or wash them and I see the injection blood stain on the right hip, I smile and think of George, Sanj and the girls. And how great it was . . . so if I wear them again, to any of the events where I need some luck, maybe it will help . . . even if it's for me to remain positive.
Some may wear symbolic and good luck jewelry, or pray to some Patron Saints for Fertility, or cast a spell . . . I'll just stick to green polka dot panties!