Sunday, September 21, 2008

Comments from Strangers

Now that I'm REALLY showing I'm starting to get lots of comments from Strangers . . . which then puts me in a weird position of smiling and going with it or some level of disclosure (without feeling like a liar or disclosing too much).

When I'm out with all my kids- 2, 5 and 7 next month I get the old, "Wow you have your hands full" or the close "You are going to have your hands full" comment. I got these same comments when Ruby was almost 2 and Preston was about to be born . . . oh, to be able to time travel, I could go back and say, "This is nothing, wait until Fall of 2008, you'll be speechless!"

The usual progression of questions . . .

"Wow, when are you due?"
I usually answer December 15th but they think more like November since it's twins and I tend to deliver early anyway.

Next is usually either:
"Twins?" or "How many kids do you have already?"

Which then leads to a few possibilities . . . .
"Wow, 5 kids?" or "Twins, are you going to dress them alike?"

Which then goes to (depending on how much disclosure) . . . .
"What do you mean they aren't yours?" or "I don't think I could do that." or "That's amazing, what a great friend you are." or even, "I've always heard of people who are surrogates but never met one in person." (I always smile at this one, like I'm a unicorn or the tooth fairy).

From there- people (strangers, not friends or most acquaintances) either move on, talk more about it superficially or worse case scenario . . . there are some who want to know every personal detail (and will ask as if it's their right to know) . . . "Who are the Parents?", "What do they do?", "How come they can't get pregnant?" (I guess never hearing about this little thing called Doctor Patient privilege), "Is it her egg and his sperm?" (one of my favorites, most of you know why) . . . this list can go on but I think you get the point I'm trying to make. That point being, it can be hard to discuss my surrogacy (with the goal of educating people) and at the same time protect the privacy of the Intended Parents and my family. It was one of the reasons I started the blog, besides keeping the Intended Parents friends and family in the loop, I can send people to it to answer some questions and not have to get into the downward spiral of some conversations.

Halloween is right around the corner-

The kids and I have been talking halloween costumes lately. I tend not to buy anything until about mid October because my kids change their minds so often on what they want to be . . . or they don't see my vision of matching costumes . . . oh wait, here we go!

Anyway, our cousins have this huge halloween party but since they live about 3 hours away, we won't be able to go. Part of my contract states that I can't travel a certain amount of miles away from the OB/Hospital once I start my third trimester. However, I still want to use my costume idea for this year. As of today (it may change) Rick and I have decided to play up the pregnant belly and we're going to be Bristol Palin and Levi for Halloween. I figure we can make a mullet and Hockey Jersey (with a W) for Rick and I may make some sort of McCain/Palin shirt for me. (Quick Disclaimer, if you can't tell my views already, I don't have one of these shirts just laying around) Maybe I'll make a Palin for Sex Education shirt instead, hmmmm, I'll have to think about that one.

There are not a lot of great choices for costumes when you're pregnant, that's for sure. Another option is painting your belly. I still have some time . . . who knows? I may not be in the mood or shape to try to dress up for Halloween. I may be the lady you hear about that sits at her door and throws candy at the kids- we'll see how I'm feeling.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Two peas in a pod

Today we had the 3D/4D ultrasound. If you haven't seen these before, they are so cool. My husband and I did one with our last baby and we thought it was unbelievable, you could see he belonged to our family . . . spitting image of his siblings, before he was even born.

The girls are currently face to face, which our sonographer said was not very common. She said usually they are positioned like a Yin Yang, facing each other but face to feet. The position they were in made it hard to get pictures easily, but she pulled off several "keepers". If you click on the picture above, you can make it larger. Anyway- top left is the girls face to face. Top right is my favorite, foreheads touching (through membrane). Bottom right and bottom left are images of each girl alone.

She was also able to measure them, weighing 2 pounds and 1 ounce each! They're getting bigger . . . but I can tell you they won't get this big!

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Dr. Knight's Iron Fist of NO SEX comes down-

Had my OB appointment the other day and things were going well . . . I gained a pound in the last 2 weeks which puts my total weight gain at 12 pounds so far. Dr. Knight was very happy with my weight stating at this rate I will have gained more with each of my singleton pregnancy's than this twin pregnancy. (Again, I'm known for "packing it on"- so doing this well wasn't really expected). I think it has something to do with the fact that the girls aren't mine. Kind of like when you're watching a friend's child and you realize you do a better job at their safety than your own children's. No, my kids don't walk around with knives or play in the street (and no one has stuck a fork through their nose) but I'm at 100% Mommy when I'm in charge of Someone Else's child.

Back to the appointment- did a quick ultrasound to check heart rates and they were great. Talked about a little ankle swelling and Dr. Knight reminded me of what I'm not supposed to be doing . . . "No working, No exercise, No excessive walking, No Sex . . ." I said, "Wait, what was that last one?" Sure enough, I heard correctly- Dr. Knight says from now on, I shouldn't have sex or orgasms because it could trigger labor. Now I have to admit, this was a surprise of sorts. I remember when Rick and I were going through the counseling part of Growing Generations we discussed how we may have to be abstinent for a while. Of course, I was just thinking around the time of hormones and the transfer. Never having twins, I didn't really think about the whole labor part. Usually within a normal pregnancy, sex is fine up until your water breaks . . . but NOT for us this time, because multiple fetuses aren't normal. So, if you see Ricky walking around with his head in the clouds and a black band around his arm, give him a pat on the back, or the name of a really great movie * wink, wink *

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

25 week Belly Picture

So I cropped the picture to remove strangers, get rid of the weird look on my face, and zoom in on the belly so it looks bigger . . . and Voila! a 25 week pregnant with twins belly picture. I'm wearing a tighter, non-maternity tank top so it's showing everything, I look pregnant and not just fat now. If you don't agree, be advised that I now have the cluster map so I can hunt you down . Sure, it only shows a "rough estimate" of where you are, Canada, Egypt, Australia, Texas . . . but I will find you and make you delete your fat comment. You've been warned! :)

It is funny though how people's perspective's are very different. Most people, including my friends who've been pregnant before or have seen me pregnant with my own in the past thought I'd be a lot bigger by now and/or think I look great for 25 weeks. I usually wear baggy tops, to hide the "left overs" from my last 3 pregnancies, so a lot of people have just started to notice that I'm pregnant. Others think I look big already. For those people, you haven't seen anything yet! :) ha!

I have been noticing that it's getting tougher to do things . . . get up from the couch, walk around for a while, and put on shorts or skirts, etc. The OB has told me that I should stop exercising, walking my kids to school, etc. That I should just do what needs to be done and not over exert myself. Usually I'd laugh and think yeah right, but carrying twins is different than my previous pregnancies, not to mention that the girls aren't mine, so I think I'll follow the directions this time around. I think I was 7 months pregnant with Sawyer when I was hauling bark cover from the front of the house to the back in a wheel barrel. I also have been known to camp and river raft at about 30 weeks . . . so you can see where this is going to be very different than my previous pregnancies.